In the past, it was believed that children don’t feel emotions the same way as adults do. However, research shows that the obstacles and stressors faced by every child during the growing up years have significant impact on a young life. Behind the carefree attitude, there may be identifiable emotional, psychological and behavioral conditions that require treatment. In most cases, it can be difficult for parents to figure out if a child is just being rambunctious or experiencing some of these emotional health issues.

The red flags that tell your child may be in need of professional help. This is NOT an all-inclusive list, but may assist you in identifying some issues:

1. Difficulties in different settings – If your child acts out at home, in school, and other places, it’s a sign he or she is feeling stressed or experiencing emotions that they could not understand. The outward manifestations, such as the tendency to behave badly, may mean they’re having a hard time managing these misunderstood emotions. Misbehavior may be in the form of breaking rules, defying authorities, or becoming aggressive with others.

2. Reclusiveness – When your child feels that they are looked down on, hated, avoided or they have no friends or anyone who would like to be associated with them, there is that tendency to withdraw and be isolated from friends or the peer group. Reclusiveness can be a behavior that you’ll notice at home too, especially when the child has developed low self-esteem, anxiety or depression.

3. General feeling of sadness and hopelessness – Children are generally exuberant and playful. It isn’t normal to see them sad, anxious, feeling hopeless, helpless, and avoiding the company of children their age or their family. These are depressive signs. Though depression is not common among children as it is in adults, it is known to affect a good  10 to 15 percent of the children and teen population with the greater tendency towards age 14 (Kalman Heller, PhD of  PsychCentral).

4. Regression – Children react differently to major changes in their lives, including a divorce between parents, death of a loved one, or the birth of a new sibling. They may feel insecure about themselves temporarily. If your child has a long-term pattern of negative self-esteem, such as clingy behavior, excessive fearfulness, sudden drop in academic performance and bedwetting that aren’t even related to any change, it may be a sign of larger issues requiring a diagnosis.

5. Significant change in sleeping and eating habits – Be concerned when your child is eating and sleeping too much or doing the exact opposite. These can be manifestations of an internal turmoil or an emotion they could not understand. A child exhibiting these worrisome symptoms for a long time may benefit from therapy.

6. Hallucinations – While anything can upset or scare children, like a creak or shadow, your child’s frequent claim of seeing things, hearing voices, or having an imaginary friend is a serious red flag of emotional stress. If your child appears confused and agitated, the immediate evaluation by an experienced counselor may be able to help.

7. Performance of senseless routines – Unwanted and intrusive thoughts that seem to occupy the mind may compel your child to repeatedly perform rituals obsessively, including frequent washing of hands, counting or checking things as an effort to ease anxiety. If this ritualistic behavior unnecessarily goes for several hours every day, there may be a deep-seated motivation for it. Your child would benefit from seeing a therapist who can administer an evaluation of the symptoms, proper diagnosis and treatment.

8. Development of self-harming behaviors – Repeated self-harming behaviors such as skin-cutting, head banging, or self-starvation is a manifestation that indicates your child may be distressed. This is a serious symptom that needs to be attended to with haste. You may have to call an expert to intervene if your child is preoccupied with thoughts of physical illness or death.

At the end of the day, your parental instinct will tell you that something may not be right with your child. Despite the best care that you are capable of giving, there are things that you cannot provide to your child as a parent. That includes treating the physical and mental conditions of your child. This is one area that requires the expertise of a child therapist.

Remember: seeking intervention is not an admission of parental failure; it is a manifestation of a parent’s great love to one’s child.  

Never be afraid to make a call for help. When you do, make sure to find someone who is qualified and can make your child feel at ease during a difficult time. The independently contracted counselors of Carolina Counseling Services – Sanford, NC are well-experienced and trained in helping children experiencing the above red flags. Therefore, as soon as you notice one or two of these signs, call the Carolina Counseling Services – Sanford, NC to request an appointment.