Ending Conflict
Before It Breaks Up Your Family
Before It Breaks Up Your Family
Even the most perfect families are not exempted from conflict that can create broken, strained, or disconnected relationships. Conflicts are part and parcel of family and relationships. They are unavoidable because, though you’re a family, each individual is different with different believes, values and opinions. While these differences can be wonderful, they can also be a source of conflict.
When expectations aren’t met it’s unlikely that you will want to end relationships with family members you may with friends. Family can be a source of love and support as well as a source of pain and frustration. Even the most painful of conflicts can be resolved with the right approaches and skills. Family counseling can help you learn them.
Living with the Tension of Unresolved Conflicts
It is difficult to relax if you are surrounded by unresolved family conflicts. A tangible tension can be felt in the air when you and the person you aren’t seeing eye to eye with are together in one room, during family events and celebrations. Moreover, this doesn’t just cause tension between the two of you: it can also affect other family members and lead you to avoid attending family events.
Letting time heal your wounds may not work in your favor. Once a misunderstanding has gone on for some time, the hurt can linger longer than it should. Though you both could opt to be civil to each other for the sake of the family, unresolved conflicts can still cause unpleasant tension on an otherwise celebratory occasion. Ending a family conflict may not be possible by minimizing contact or by cutting the person out of your life. Finding a way to resolve differences is often the best option.
Conflict Resolution: Mending Broken Family Ties
Where there are at least two people relating with each other, there will be conflict. It is inevitable. The more people are involved, the bigger the potential for disagreements. Despite the love that connects a family, it isn’t immune from the destructive effects of conflicts. The key, therefore, isn’t preventing conflicts, but resolving them.
What is conflict resolution? According to CTB, “Conflict resolution is a way for two or more parties to find a peaceful solution to a disagreement among them.” It is a way to settle disputes, whether in a family or in the workplace. Its goals are: (1) To come up with a win-win solution that’s agreeable for all members/parties involved; (2) Work quickly toward finding a solution; and (3) To protect the harmonious or loving relationship between the individuals or parties in conflict.
Conflict resolution requires skills for it to succeed. It can be difficult to find common ground as most disagreements are emotionally charged. To mend broken family relationships, conflict resolution with a therapist or counselor may be a better choice. There are many benefits that your family can derive from family counseling, including resolving conflicts.
Resolving Conflicts with Family Counseling
Addressing the sources of misunderstandings and resolving the ensuing conflicts in a family can be extremely challenging, even for trained mediators. There are many layers to family relationships and when conflicts have gone on for an extended period of time they can be further complicated.
It takes a family counselor to look beyond the emotions and preconceived notions. A therapist can help you to identify how you feel and what you want. In sessions you can learn skills together to effectively communicate and resolve conflict.
Family counseling, a form of psychotherapy, works to end family conflicts because it can “reduce distress and conflict by improving the systems of interactions between family members,” says Healthy Psych. It also works because it is a strength-based treatment. This means that it is based on a framework that considers family conflicts “as patterns or systems that need adjusting,” rather than a problem that resides in an individual member.
Carolina Counseling Services — Sanford, NC contracts with skilled, licensed counselors and therapists. Our caring Scheduling Team can help you find the therapist that is right for you and your family. Online counseling sessions are available, call today!