Everyone Processes Loss Differently:
Moving Forward Together
with Family Therapy

Loss is unfortunately a part of the human experience. When you love someone you open yourself up to many wonderful things, however, you also open yourself up to grief and loss. When a family member is lost it will not only affect you, but your family as well. It can be difficult to be there for others when you are processing your own grief. Family therapy can help. 

Each Family Member Has Their Own Grief

Death or loss in the family, and the grief that follows, poses unique challenges for each individual member. Couples may face significant struggles in their relationship due to their different grief styles. While women tend to be more expressive about their emotions and pay attention to each family member’s grief, men are more likely to deny the emotions of grief by substituting it with work, sports or hobbies. When one spouse tries to talk, cry or share emotions, disappointment can be felt by finding the other spouse is unavailable. Grief is the time when they cannot share what they feel even if they have the same grief. 

Experiencing grief poses unique challenges in the role of each individual family member. Parents may find it more challenging to keep a sense of order or responsibility in the family home. It can be challenging to focus on their grief and their children’s. Unfortunately, the loss felt by children can sometimes be overlooked or played down. Unprocessed grief can result in children feeling lost, confused, and alone, especially without the guidance of a grief-stricken parent. The way each family member processes grief can create tension in family relationships.

It is never easy to undergo a serious loss, and it can take time to grasp its reality. The family may become overwhelmed or bogged down by their grief. In time, however, as days, weeks and months pass by, grief can gradually lead to acceptance, healing and moving forward. 

While moving forward is often the goal, it can be difficult to get there. Many get stuck in their feelings of grief, it can become complicated and lead to depression and/or anxiety. 

A Family that Grieves Individually Heals Together

Within a family, each member may have a different way of experiencing grief depending on the relationship each one had with the person who has passed. Often, strong emotions can run rampant in families and impact relationships.

You and the other family members may have clung together at the funeral, trying to reach out for each other during a difficult time. Indeed, the loss of a beloved family member can be one of life’s most painful blows, yet everyone’s reaction to death is different. When grieving for your loss, you may feel abandoned, unsupported, isolated, and alone. It doesn’t have to stay that way. 

While you all grieve in your own unique way and express your feelings in different ways, each of you has one thing in common: Each of you holds the person you have lost dear to your heart and mind. Each of you has preserved a different facet of your departed loved one deeply within you. Whatever mix of emotions and other visible signs there may be, know that everyone is grieving, and the pain each individual feels is as legitimate as yours. It can be difficult to come together after a loss, family therapy can help. 

Family Therapy After a Loss

While everyone processes loss and grief differently it is something we all deal with. It can be difficult to understand other’s processes on our own. Family therapy can help. 

Working with a counselor can help your family to express their feelings and process in a healthy way. Together you can learn healthy communication skills and begin to lean on each other in new ways, moving forward together. CCS – Sanford Office contracts with family counselors who can help. Call today to get started.